Washington, Feb 11: There was no fear in what she wrote in her letters in captivity, but had contemplation, forgiveness and faith. Kayla knew that there was only God who could give her the supreme strength to survive and relied on her faith to reunite with her parents in USA. Mueller had written,"I remember mom always telling me that all in all in the end the only one you really have is God."
Kidnapped by the Islamic State in 2013, she was kept captive for a year and a half by the militant group and confirmed to be dead recently while in captivity. Her heartbroken parents read out the last few letters in public to show that their daughter was brave and did not fear death.
What she said:
Everyone, If you are receiving this letter it means I am still detained but my cell mates (starting from 11/2/2014) have been released. I have asked them to contact you + send you this letter. It's hard to know what to say.
Please know that I am in a safe location, completely unharmed + healthy (put on weight in fact); I have been treated w/ the utmost respect + kindness. I wanted to write you all a well thought out letter (but I didn't know if my cell mates would be leaving in the coming days or the coming months restricting my time but primarily) I could only but write the letter a paragraph at a time, just the thought of you all sends me into a fit of tears.
If you could say I have "suffered" at all throughout this whole experience it is only in knowing how much suffering I have put you all through; I will never ask you to forgive me as I do not deserve forgiveness.
I remember mom always telling me that all in all in the end the only one you really have is God. I have come to a place in experience where, in every sense of the word, I have surrendered myself to our creator b/c literally there was no else.... + by God + by your prayers I have felt tenderly cradled in freefall.
I have been shown in darkness, light + have learned that even in prison, one can be free. I am grateful. I have come to see that there is good in every situation, sometimes we just have to look for it. I pray each each day that if nothing else, you have felt a certain closeness + surrender to God as well + have formed a bond of love + support amongst one another... I miss you all as if it has been a decade of forced separation. I have had many a long hour to think, to think of all the things I will do w/Lex, our first family camping trip, the first meeting @ the airport.
I have had many hours to think how only in your absence have I finally @ 25 years old come to realize your place in my life. The gift that is each one of you + the person I could + could not be if you were not a part of my life, my family, my support. I DO NOT want the negotiations for my release to be your duty, if there is any other option take it, even if it takes more time. '
This should never have become your burden. I have asked these women to support you; please seek their advice. If you have not done so already .. can contact ... who may have a certain level of experience with these people. None of us could have known it would be this long but know I am also fighting from my side in the ways I am able + I have a lot of fight left inside of me. I am not breaking down + I will not give in no matter how long it takes.
I wrote a song some months ago that says, "The part of me that pains the most also gets me out of bed, w/out your hope there would be nothing left..." aka-The thought of your pain is the source of my own, simultaneously the hope of our reunion is the source of my strength. Please be patient, give your pain to God. I know you would want me to remain strong. That is exactly what I am doing. Do not fear for me, continue to pray as will I + by God's will we will be together soon.
All my everything,
The 26-year old air worker from the US had stayed overnight at the Doctors without Borders compound in Aleppo where she was kidnapped on August 4, 2013. Islamic State militants claimed that she was killed in Jordanian airstrikes on Friday when bombs hit the building that held her.
But before going, she left a strong message behind with her experience as a humanitarian worker and as a hostage. She had spent five months working with an organization in India and had worked in Israel at a development center for African refugees. In 2007, she was honored with the Presidential Volunteer Award for her contribution in the Youth Count, AmeriCorps, America's Promise, Open Inn and Big Brothers Big Sisters, among other groups.
In the year when she was kidnapped, she travelled to the Turkish-Syrian border to work with Danish Refugee Council and Support to Life, which is a human rights group that works with Syrian refugees.
Confirming her death were her parents and the US authorities who said,"We are heartbroken to share that we've received confirmation that Kayla Jean Mueller, has lost her life." In a statement, Carl and Marsha Mueller said,"We are so proud of the person Kayla was and the work that she did while she was here with us. She lived with purpose."
Her final words were,"Please be patient, give your pain to God," she wrote. "I know you would want me to remain strong. That is exactly what I am doing. Do not fear for me, continue to pray as will I + by God's will we will be together soon."