London, Aug 17 : American actress Lindsay Lohan's first ever-lesbian lover Courtenay Semel has come forward to reveal the harrowing secret affair she had with the 'Mean Girls' star.
Semel was the first girl that Lohan shared her lesbian inclination with, and it had been a very covert relationship, unlike the one she is now having with British DJ Samantha Ronson.
"Everyone thinks Samantha is Lindsay's first lesbian love, but we were very passionate until her fear of being found out drove us apart," News of the World quoted Semel as telling a pal.
"At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed her sexual tendencies.
"But then Samantha came on to the scene and I was dropped," she added.
Semel, 25, also revealed that Lohan, 22, bedded a string of men in a bid to suppress her lesbian urges, and to hide them from her public.
She further revealed how as the pressure of her double life grew, Lohan fell into addictions, and finally having a bizarre love triangle with Ronson and her.
"She met Lindsay in the summer of 2006 at a party in Malibu," Semel's pal explained.
"From the start Lindsay was very confused about her feelings for Courtenay so did more and more drugs to stifle the sexual attraction she was experiencing.
"But eventually she just gave in and at every party they'd kiss and touch each other in the corner. It's a miracle nobody found out.
"Both of them would do lines of cocaine in the toilets then head home and fall into bed together," the pal said.
The two went through an on-off relationship as Lohan checked into a succession of rehab units, and continued to date men as a 'cover'.
But it was as early as January 2007 that she first met 31-year-old Samantha, sister of pop guru Mark Ronson.
"Back then Samantha and Lindsay didn't have a physical relationship," the pal continued.
"She once said, 'Samantha's the father I never had'!
"Apparently Samantha acted in a 'paternal' way towards her, giving her advice and cuddles," the pal stated.
At one stage, the friend added, both Semel and Ronson were separately visiting Lindsay at a rehab unit called Promises.
"By now Lindsay was sending 'I love you' notes to Samantha and signing them 'Lindsay Ronson' but telling Courtenay she loved her too," the pal went on.
By October, Courtenay appeared to have the upper hand. She and Lindsay moved into a rented house in Beverly Hills.
"But still Lindsay brought men back," the pal added.
"Courtenay would throw fits of rage, writing her hundreds of angry e-mails from another room in the house.
"The sexual attraction between them was electric though and they'd still kiss and make up," the pal said.
That ended last December when Lohan bedded one man too many and, unable to take more humiliation, Semel moved out.
It was less than a week later that Samantha was back on the scene. Outwardly, at least, Lindsay became a changed person, even turning blonde.
"Courtenay still can't understand how Lindsay is now so open with Samantha," the pal commented.
"Every time she sees a picture of them together it kills her," the pal added.