The 39 signs of drunkenness!

Melbourne, July 6 : The next time your husband turns up drunk at home but behaves as if he's not, just observe his speech and walk to make out whether he's lying or not.

Bureaucrats in Australia have drawn up an official list of 39 intoxication symptoms, so that pub owners can tell when patrons are drunk.

Among the 39 steps towards drunkenness are: "bumping into furniture", "sleeping at a bar or table" and "inability to find one's mouth with a glass".

The intoxication guidelines, drawn up by the New South Wales Office of Liquor and Gaming, were distributed to club and pub managers last week.

Number one on the list of 39 signs of intoxication is slurred words, followed by rambling or unintelligible conversation, reports News.com.au.

Bar staff are also urged to be on the lookout for patrons fumbling change, being rude, argumentative and aggressive, and those who cannot stand or who fall down.

Club patrons seen as "overly friendly" or exuberant could also soon find themselves shown the door, as will those who vomit.

If a patron fails to leave, managers have been advised to contact police in order to avoid being fined.

The department said the guidelines were drafted to help bar staff form a reasonable belief that a person is intoxicated. However, it warned that the list was neither exhaustive nor conclusive.

The 39 signs of drunkenness are:

1. Slurring words

2. Rambling or unintelligible conversation

3. Incoherent or muddled speech

4. Loss of train of thought

5. Not understanding normal conversation

6. Difficulty in paying attention

7. Unsteady on feet

8. Swaying uncontrollably

9. Staggering

10. Difficulty in walking straight

11. Cannot stand or falling down

12. Stumbling

13. Bumping into or knocking over furniture and people

14. Lack of co-ordination

15. Spilling drinks

16. Dropping drinks

17. Fumbling change

18. Difficulty counting money or paying

19. Difficulty opening doors

20. Inability to find one's mouth with a glass

21. Rudeness

22. Agression

23. Belligerent

24. Argumentative

25. Offensive

26. Bad tempered

27. Physically violent

28. Loud or boisterous

29. Confused

30. Disorderly

31. Exuberance

32. Using offensive language

33. Annoying or pestering others

34. Overly friendly

35. Loss of inhibition

36. Inappropriate sexual advances

37. Drowsiness or sleeping at a bar or table

38. Vomiting

39. Drinking rapidly

ANI